Context: this was written the morning before the featurette Olaf’s Frozen Adventure.
Dear Mama and Papa,
It’s the start of the holidays, the first since Anna and I reconnected. While it is exciting, I can’t help but think so many things could go wrong.
I can hear you, Papa, in the crackle of the fire. I can feel your strong arms wrapping around me. I can feel your heartbeat. One-two, three-four, five-six… You were always so patient with me.
I can see your light, Mama, in the sparks that fly from the hearth. You showed me what life meant to live with joy and determination. When the darkness closed in around me, you would bring me back to the light with your melodies.
When I look in the mirror, I often can’t help but feel like you’re gone because of me. Sometimes, from the corner of my eye, I think I see you standing behind me, your hands on my shoulders.
The warmth of the fire reminds me of how you would talk about self-love. You told me that to keep the wolf inside at bay, I must recognize the lies. The lie that I’m not enough… The lie that I’m not lovable… The lie that there is something wrong with me… I think I better understand now what you meant.
Life has not been easy for me…for us.
It helps to write to you every day. The gentle scratch of pen on paper reminds me of your research, Mama. I remember sitting on your lap as you would map out the constellations. I can feel your hand on the back of mine as I write, just like when you would guide me in a drawing.
As I settle into my dress for the day, I think of you Papa, reminding me that we lead our people with strength and love. You never discouraged me from facing the pains within. You showed me what it meant to be strong with vulnerability, not in spite of it.
Today, as Anna and I prepare to ring the bell, I will carry you in my heart. When a tear slips down my cheek, I’m thinking of you both. I’m remembering the times you held me. And a part of me hopes that when I reach to ring the bell, your hands will reach out from behind me to help us.
I love you,
Elsa
Note: I had some input from a couple of friends, which included DaimonLyra. Also, I’m heavily influenced by DaimonLyra’s Frozen Moments. It’s hard for me to separate which of my ideas came from the movies, my own theorizing, and Frozen Moments. DL’s fanfic has incredibly rich details if you have not already read it.
This was originally written as part of a writing contest in Arendelle Odyssey.